History Of Touches

I don’t want to find someone who makes my heart skip a beat 

I want to find someone who 

adds another every time I see her 

until one day my heart will beat so fast 

I’ll have to put both my hands into my chest 

just to try and keep it still

I want to find someone who can dance with me 

to the melody of our laughter

someone who’s willing to auction off 

our fondest memories in return for 

secured realities

and when I find you
I'm going to love you so hard
a woman who sees us
is going to slap her husband across the face

and tell him,
" that's how its done "

when I find you
every time we kiss
we'll never be in peace
because Hollywood directors
are dying to get a shot of it
because none of their actors are getting it just right

when I find you
every time you touch me
historians will feel obliged to record it
and 20 years down the road

Time magazine
will feature it as
" Today In History "

when I find you
I promise I'll hold you in the cold
as long as you be my diamonds and gold
I hope you won't mind me turning you into literature
in hopes that i can make you live forever

when I find you
I hope you won't mind my silence
because emptiness is a lot heavier than you think
and I've been carrying it with me all these years
my hands have a habit of shaking when I'm anxious
but I hope you won't mind holding them anyway
when I'm having a hard time keeping eye contact
please don't be sad
I'm just so used to looking at the ground
because all my life
people keep pushing me down
the second I try to get back up
when you try to touch me

and I flinch
I hope you don't take it the wrong way
because the last time someone I loved touched me
it hurt
when I cry in the middle of the night
I hope you won't leave me the way she did
when I show you my wounds
I hope you kiss them instead

I hope you fall for my flaws
the way I fell for you

this imperfect human
but still some good too