Her

all I ask
is to sacrifice this heart to the skies
hoping to resurrect as someone
malicious enough to no longer care about you

the first time I saw you,
every thing in my head went quiet
all the tics and turns of
greasy, rusted gears
just
disappeared
I could only think about
the hairpin curve
of your lips
and how good
happiness looked on you

you are the sleeping city beside me
streetlights, warm tar and cement
vast and familiar
a butterfly
flapping its wings across a mountain
moving somewhere inside me
and your fingerprints are all over it
you are like a shipwreck drowning in my chest
or the fight, the winning or
the losing battle

but I did not lose
someone who cared about me
You did.

wasn't I man enough for you ?
wasn't the honey dripping off
my fingertips sweet enough ?
you see, I wrote this on the backbone of
a tall white flag
so you'll know that
I've already given up
but pierce my lips with a broken promise
and I'll vomit one million reasons
why I should give you just
one more chance

I still remember you
like a dream tattooed to
the inner lining of my long term memory
and pressed in the basement of my eyelids
and most days I'm afraid I'll keep you there
shackled, tied and chained
to the most important
chapters of my life
how dare you still linger on my lips
your stuttering apology
and excuses
still ringing in my ear

you are a year ago
you are the ache in the empty
you are my favorite cold shower
and when people ask me
what my favorite moment is,
I will say you

I will always say you.