everything about this fucking blog makes me sad.
i hate writing
i hate how it makes me feel
i hate having to indulge myself in my feelings
however good
or bad
they may be
just so that i could write them
yet this is the only way
for me to let out
i fucking hate it
i hate having to stay up late
to a point where
i am neither conscious or unconscious
so that i would not
remember what these words are all about
so that i can write down whats truly burdening my chest
i hate how the light from the monitor glares my eyes
and how the keys feel as i smash them

i used to love writing
its been
its always been my one
true passion
if i've lost this
what else have i got to lose


for fucks sake